"Practice this and when you can do it, I'll guarantee that your man will be satisfied for the rest of his life," said her mother.

So the girl practiced and practiced until her wedding night. While her anxious husband waited for her in the bed, she emerged wearing a sexy negligee, carrying a can of biscuit dough. She opened the can, threw the dough on the floor, lifted her negligee, and squatted over the dough.

Expecting to only pick up the biscuit she had a very unexpected episode of gas, which made a thunderous growling sound.

Her husband was startled, jumped from the bed and backed away.

"What's wrong honey?" she asked.

He replied, "Shit woman, if that thing barks like that for a biscuit, I sure as hell don't want to throw any meat at it!"